Go ahead! Make fun of us millennials. We’re always leaving jobs too quickly. Jobs are not like they used to be. I remember a man telling me that after college, coming from a top school, I should not make less than $50,000 a year, have a company phone or stipend, and potentially a company car. Most opportunities that came to me were commission-based or paid me $11 an hour. I worked my butt off in college to come out into the job market with low pay, despite internships, jobs, and magna cum laude honors.
My first job started at $15 an hour. Realistically, looking at other job descriptions, I should have been making $60,000 a year, but at the time, I wanted to spend the time working my way up. I stayed at a company for one year, they worked me as hard as they could, severely underpaid me, and there were no prospects of climbing up in the company. I started developing anxiety from the job. Despite being overworked and underpaid, I kept hope alive. I waited until one year came along for a one year review, and nothing. After one year of being at the company, there was no review. I asked for some feedback and what direction they saw for me at the company, and I got a pat on the back, a couple of critiques, but mostly a confirmation that I was needed on the team. As a young woman looking for more, I opened myself up to other opportunities.
Fast forward to a new job making well over $50,000 a year. I was brought in for my expertise to take charge and create an entire department by myself. I set everything in place, and again, received a pat on the back about how valuable I was, and no promotion or acknowledgment. There was a slight raise in pay, but no promise of advancement at the company. When I addressed my concerns that my team needed to grow to meet demand, I was told that I could do more work to fill in the gap, and my team doesn’t have enough work, despite months of effort and reporting to indicate that we are falling behind without more manpower. So where does this leave me? Wondering if I should consider moving on.
I am in a valley of decision right now, but here is what I learned in considering calling it quits:
- Job destroying your mental health? That will not get better.
No matter what, staying at a job that destroys your sense of self or causes anxiety attacks is not okay. This was me at my first job. I was suffering and when I prayed to God, He would tell me to stay. It was devastating. What I learned most about this was to set boundaries.
I was the kind of person that would do unlimited overtime, work weekends to fill in the gap, take whatever shift, skip a break for a little extra pay. I wasn’t doing that anymore. Lack of boundaries at my job taught me to work my required shift, not share all of my ideas without some sort of benefit, and to take breaks for my own mental health. I literally scheduled days off just to do nothing for my own sanity.
I finally got in my head, jobs don’t care about any of us. If you leave, they will replace you and if you stay, they will get as much as they can out of you until they can’t get any more from you.
2. Do you have a boss that will advocate for you? No, leave.
Even if your boss can’t get you what you want, it’s important to know they have your back and they are not selling you out to make themselves look better.
In my first real job, my boss was inexperienced and young. Even though I was also inexperienced, I was still better at my job than she was. She would often steal information from me to share with the executive team to make herself look better. She would also undermine me in front of the team to assert her authority, which made it difficult to gain respect from my team. Before I left, I had to train her on how to do my job so she could manage the new manager. She wouldn’t advocate for me, which is the main reason I left. I knew that I would never grow under her.
In my second job, my boss was a little more experienced, (still relatively inexperienced) but much more privileged. He was in his role just because the company liked him. He hired me for the job, but he didn’t know my job, which gave me a great deal of leverage. They were desperate and I had answers. Originally, I was building my own department. Once I built out the department, my boss and his boss began to undermine and micromanage me. I’ve been at the company for a year, built an entire department, hired and solely trained a team, written several marketing materials that are used throughout our company and the only reward? What seems to be a demotion: I spend most of my day doing the strategy I created and implemented and trained my team for.
What’s worse, the same pattern has followed. After one year of being at my job, I asked my boss about a one year review, and he denied me the opportunity, saying they will begin to implement quarterly reviews as a company in the future.
What does this let me know? The company does not care about my future at the company despite liking what I bring to the table. When asked for consideration, I will be denied the opportunity to talk about it and trust me, I tried several times.
3. Your boss doesn’t listen to your concerns? They never will.
I will keep this one short. Professional does not mean you lose humanity. If you bring up concerns or mention how something isn’t fulfilling to you at your job, your boss’s response lets you know what will happen.
When I hired my team, I made it a point regularly ask them about how they felt about their role at the company. Whatever they mention, I make sure to hear them out, I tell them what is and what isn’t in my power, and I advocate for them to make change wherever I can. I try to be the boss I wish I had.
A good boss will do this if they value you. A bad boss will reject, deny, gaslight, or ignore you. Most of the times, they are more concerned about keeping their job than they are about your growth at the company. These bosses are toxic because they depend on you heavily and at the same time, don’t care about you.
If they don’t listen now and take your frustrations as warnings of discontentment, they most certainly never will listen or care. The only way to get their attention is to leave the job.
4. A better opportunity has come along and pays you more. What’s your question?
Comfort is never a reason to stay at your job. Leave. It’s only up from here.
5. The commute is inconvenient.
Don’t count the hours you work, also count how many hours in your day you have to dedicate to this job. If you work 9-6, but take an hour to commute, that’s 8-7. 11 hours of your day is dedicated to work. At this point, with proper sleep, you will have 4-5 hours to do other things. Consider this if you want to have a life outside of work.
6. You are working on your side hustle.
What are your long and short term goals? If the job simply irritates you, but you can manage, and in five years, you will be running your own company, unless there is a clear benefit to leaving that will help your long term goals, leaving makes no sense for you. You will just have to start somewhere fresh to prove yourself with no guarantees. If no. 6 is coupled with any of the five above, leave!
It’s hard to know when to leave your job. It is nice to be able to leave though, so remember, there are always job opportunities out there. You are not stuck and you don’t need to be somewhere that doesn’t serve you. Shop the market, and look at your exit strategy. If you can, plan your peaceful and graceful exit.
God’s grace on you! You got this!
This Girl's Worth 